I am certain that many of you have already seen the photo and read the vicious rumors that have been circulating on the internet this week about myself and our presidential campaign. These rumors are total fabrication and a ploy of my opponents to discredit me. I expected this to happen...just not quite so soon. However, the fact that these rumors and this purported photo of me have surfaced should give all of my supporters a lift. It means that the campaign is getting some traction...it's getting noticed and, of course, that is just what we had hoped for.
In the spirit of full disclosure, I am posting the supposed photo of me here. The quality of the photo is such that I can't really say who it is in this photo, but I can assure all of my loyal supporters that I never shook hands with that woman, a democrat...never hosted a democratic mass meeting at my home (no one could ever prove this one way or the other since no one ever attends democrat mass meetings in Utah County)...never drank anything from that Pepsi machine...and I certainly never voted for Jimmy Carter (I mean this was the man who was almost killed by a bunny!).